462nd post, night.
C O N F U S E D .
This is the first song that came to my mind:
I don't know, where to go, what's the right team / I want my own thing / So bad I'm gonna scream / I can't choose, so confused / What's it all mean / I want my own dream / So bad I'm gonna scream
I feel so stifled now, please just stop asking and trust in me.
Adulthood is really taxing and I'm not even fully there yet.
count your life with smiles, not tears.
12:00 AM
461th post, afternoon.
Just.. played a Boscolie fan made video and I am overwhelmed with feels now.
I thought I was over and done with this ship but I guess not..
It still hurts when I look back at photos or videos.
Still torn between two sides of me.
One side of me really hopes that they will be able to resolve whatever problems or differences they had and reconcile some day, like Andy and Sammi.
Another side of me thinks that if they were really unhappy together/had irreconcilable differences, I would wish them all the best in finding their respective partners, partners that will give them abundance joy and happiness. Because I really want Myolie to be happy.
I guess.. we can only leave it up to fate.
count your life with smiles, not tears.
4:50 PM
460th post, night.
It's 2014!
Omg I can't believe another year passed just like that.
And I'm turning 20 this year, wow.
It's like I'm really gonna reach adulthood soon, yet I still look like a kid, feel like a kid.
Anyway, I just had the sudden impulse to note down some new year resolutions.
Let's hope most, if not all, of them are fulfilled by next year.
Though they're numbered, all the resolutions are equally important:
1. Get fitter! Like toned body, arms, legs and all. I have been saying I wanna start exercising for the longest time ever. It's time I put it into action.
2. Read more! I'm really lacking in general knowledge and I want to improve on my languages.
3. Gain more life experiences! Yes, this means go out into the real world and start working.
4. Learn new skills! I wanna learn how to play some musical instruments, starting with the guitar. I wanna learn how to drive a car. I wanna learn some new languages, probably starting with korean, and improve on my dialects - cantonese and teochew. I wanna learn how to take good pictures (but first i have to earn some money to buy myself a better camera).
5. I hope I can muster up the courage to talk to Myo (or at least ask for a photo together / autograph) lol
6. Have more courage in trying things I want to do / am interested in.
7. Constantly improve myself! I wanna be a better person, daughter, sister, friend etc.
8. I hope I can earn enough to bring my family on a trip.
That's about it for now. I'll add in some more if I happen to think of any.
Happy new year!
count your life with smiles, not tears.
2:59 AM
